Compromise is Overrated



Conventional wisdom says we all need to compromise. If only the politicians, bosses, clients, customers, spouses… would compromise. Then, what?

The implied promise is that everything would be great! Sure, neither side would get everything, but both sides would get something, and at least we would be getting things done.

Compromise is overrated. It starts with the premise that we are on different sides. Why do we have to be? It moves to the idea that we can’t get what we want and need. Who says? It suggests that if you don’t give in a little, you’re wrong. What if you’re right?

All compromise is based on give and take, but there can be no give and take on fundamentals. Any compromise on mere fundamentals is surrender. For it is all give and no take.

– Gandhi

As Gandhi said, you can’t compromise on fundamentals. Would you compromise with a serial killer? “How about instead of killing 28 people, you just kill 14. Can’t you meet me half way here?” That just doesn’t work.

Whose voices are you hearing in your head?

A woman try to whisper or screaming

What we say to ourselves in our heads determines our future. Those little voices determine our thoughts, feelings, dreams, moods, and how we feel about ourselves. Those voices can help us accomplish our goals or lead us to dismiss them as silly wishes that we will never achieve.

We all constantly talk to ourselves and narrate everything that’s happening to us. (Let’s remember to use our inside voices so the men in white coats don’t come to get us.) This internal monologue can help or hurt us depending on:

Whose voices are you hearing?

What are you telling yourself?

Are you controlling the voices or are the voices controlling you?

We need to be aware of our internal monologue. Then we need to take control of it.

If you notice that the voice you just heard in your head telling you that you aren’t good enough is from your mom/dad/boss/teacher who always put you down, now is the time to create a strategy to erase that voice and replace it with a positive one…